August 11, 2007 - Saturday - 2:41am
ALLOW ME TO LET LOOSE MY BITTERNESS
Dear -----,
Let’s start from history… It’s been more than two years, yet there is still a question that keeps bugging me. Up to now, I still do not know the answer. It’s quite hard to express that question for I’m anxious of what the answer will be. On the other hand, I’m scared of what your answer will be. I’m holding that assumption that your answer is the negative.
Now that I’m in to issues which are of no truth, my mind started to recall the errors I have done which caused people to think of me falsely and the things I’ve been through that made me to what I am right now. I came to realize you’re one of the factors that contributed to the woman that I am now. You might be asking why or how, but I guess you have an idea of what my answer will be. You broke my heart!
You thought I was over it? Yes I’m over it and I have moved on from the emotional suffering you caused. But the memories of the past kept haunting me in the two years since that tragedy. You know what that tragedy I am talking about! Once in a while, that familiar pain keeps penetrating my heart. No, that pain had always been inside my heart, it had always been there all along, implanted in there since you sowed its seeds.
There’s no point justifying yourself for I will not listen to your stupid explanation. The hurt you caused made me bitter, careful in trusting, and objective, and that became the basis of my being strong. I am now strong!
Well, I am not angry. I am just expressing. I may be boastful and with pride now, but you know me, and only you knows how to weaken my defenses. I’m not hoping, not wanting, and most of all I don’t love you anymore.
Bitterly yours,
Dom
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